Obsessions
by Trina and Crystal
Summary: My Work is here now: archiveofourown. org/users/Crystal/works Tommy is a bit obsessed with Adam's hands. Adam Lambert/Tommy Joe Ratliff Written by: Crystal Adommy
1. Chapter 1

**Obsessions**

It's growing rather unhealthy, this obsession of mine. I don't even remember how it started, but now I can't stop it. Those hands, his hands. He'd play with my hair, slid his finger along my chin, even a slap on the ass every now and then.

Then it got to me watching him during songs. How he'd slid them, where he's place them. Even the smallest things I'd find sexy. They way he'd push his hair out of his face. How he used his hands to express himself when he talked. Watching him drive was one of the worst. The way he'd wrap his fingers around the wheel, his hand on the gear shift. I don't know how many times I stopped myself from putting my hand over his, or sliding my fingers along his hand on the gear shift.

I knew it was getting really bad when one day I stumbled across a video on YouTube. There was a part in the interview where he was talking about his hands. I sat there enthralled like a fan boy as the camera focused on his hands. They looked so sexy and used. The rings making them pretty, the chipped and worn black polish adding a different element of sexy all together. I found myself re watching it again and again. I was pathetic really. He's like my best friend, why all the sudden am I turning into a blithering fan boy every time those hands are on me.

As if it were even possible, he has made it even worse. He got the idea in his head to come over during my introduction and start sliding his hand along my bass, like I do when I play. All I can do is stand there mesmerized as his hand wraps around the neck and starts sliding up and down. He changes it every time, and every time it gets more and more sexual. I seriously can't stop thinking about it after he does it. How he grips it, the pace of his movements. Fuck. Am I even talking about the bass anymore?

I have to say my birthday was the worst of all. Of course he said it was all for me, in that god forsaken tone he gets sometimes. Then he proceeds to sit on the stage and pretend to jack off with the fucking microphone. Once I got back to my room that night it was all I could think about. At first it was just the thought of him jacking off. Those hands slowly working himself to release. It was bad enough I thought of that. I never really thought of him that way. He's like my best friend, but my mind was set on him and those damned hands. Obviously I had no control of my thoughts, because the next thing I know I'm hard as a rock at the thought of him jacking me off. Those hands, those gloves. I still can't believe I got off to the thought of that. Although I thought afterward, that it would take care of my obsession. I was so wrong.

The next concert I was actually nervous. I really didn't know how I was going to react. I couldn't let on anything though. Well at least I tried, I swear when he put his finger under my chin for the Fever kiss I shivered. All I could do was hope he didn't notice. Sadly I think he did. Later during my introduction he was all on me. Threw his arm around me, sliding his hand along my chest I shuddered against him. Now I know he felt that, there was no way he could have missed it being that close to me. I just knew he was going to say something to me. As much as I love him, he can be such a bastard sometimes. All I could do was wait for the inevitable.

We have adjoining rooms like we always do. Which usually doesn't bother me, but I found myself for the first time locking the door between them earlier today. I think it was for my sanity. I'm far from worried about him. I can't trust myself, especially if he decides to be extra vocal when he's... No, no I'm not going to think about that. I refuse.

I need to distract myself. Maybe I'll mess around with my guitar, or listen to some music. Just as I slip my headphones on there's a knock at the adjoining door. Shit.

"Just a sec." I say taking my headphones off and getting up.

I walk over and open the door to see him standing there leaning against the frame on his side. His arms are crossed as he looks down at me.

"Why'd you lock the door?" His eyebrow arched as he spoke.

"Oh. I dunno." I blatantly lie. Maybe to keep me from rubbing myself against your damn hands.

He reached out and ruffled my hair. God damn it, I want to mutter.

"You're so silly Tommy Joe. Come on, let me in."

There was no way I can deny him, then he'd know for sure something was up. I back up, letting him in. He walks over to the bed and sits back against the pillows. I arch an eyebrow at him.

"Comfortable?"

"Yes, very." He grins in reply.

He brings his hands together, picking at the chipped polish. I can't keep my eyes off his fingers. He's staring so intently I know I won't get caught. Completely oblivious to my state, he strikes up a conversation.

"So what are you gonna do tonight?" he asks casually.

"I..." I tear my eyes away from his hands. "I hadn't really thought about it." I busy myself around the room. I put my headphones away, gather some clothes together. His presence is really unnerving.

"Oh." is his only reply. He sits there a minute then speaks again. "You want to go out or something? I really didn't have any plans either." He confesses.

As if I can't tell, he would already be dressed. He's sitting on my bed in a Queen t-shirt and some gray sweat pants. His hands drop into his lap as he waits for my reply. I can do nothing but stare when I turn to look at him. He's absently running his hand along his thigh, I hold my breath. I'm so lost right now, all I can do is hope I answered, hope he hasn't noticed my eyes boring a hole through his hand. Then comes his voice, a low tone that I can hear the smirk in.

"Want something Tommy?"

I bite my lip and drop my head, hoping my hair will cover the look in my eyes. How the fuck did he know? OK don't be stupid Tommy, he had to have felt the little things, seen the looks.

"Look at me kitty."

Did he really have to use that name right now? I reluctantly look up, becoming extremely shy around him. I'm never like that, well until recently.

"I know something is going on with you. I know it has something to do with me. I just can't put my finger on it."

I want more than a finger on it. The thought comes uninhibited, and I'm glad it wasn't out loud.

"Come here." He pats the bed beside him.

My mind says go, and for some ungodly reason, my body complies. I move over to the bed, slowly crawling onto it, kneeling beside him. Once again I can't look at him. Big mistake. He slides his hand under my chin and tilts my face up. I can't stop the small shiver at the touch.

"Tell me Tommy." His eyes are locked on mine, there is no way I can look away with his hand on my chin.

"I can't." I whisper it and his hand falls away, sliding along my chest.

God damn him. If he only knew what that was doing to me. His slight touch, albeit not sexual at all to him, is a jolt of sexual energy, scorching my skin though my t-shirt. His hand stops on my thigh and I whimper before I can censor it. He arches an eyebrow. I think it is slowly dawning on him. He slides his hand along my thigh. I know he is testing my reaction. I bite my lip to keep from moaning as his fingers graze my inner thigh. He moves his hand away and brings it up to my face. I'm free falling into the sweet sensation of his hands.

His hand slides against my cheek, and I am lost. My eyes slip closed and I lean into the touch, like a kitten looking for more. His finger moves over my lips and I resist the urge to snake my tongue out to taste his skin.

"Tell me Tommy... please." He whispers it this time, as his hand slides around to the back of my neck. His other hand is on me now, sliding along my arm.

I try to steel myself against the feel of his hands. The slight touch, the way he moves them. The hand on my neck moves up gently massaging along my hair line. I'm losing composure fast, sanity falling away.

"Adam." I nearly moan it. "It's...it's.." His hand on my arm slides down to my hand, his fingers sliding along my own. He laces them with mine, slowly tightening the grip. The rough skin, the smooth feel of the rings he's wearing, the force behind his grip.

"Fuck... your hands. Your fucking hands." I can't take it anymore, that forceful grip has thrown me over the cliff.

"My hands?" he inquires as they continue their deadly assault on my skin.

"Yes." I can't believe he has drug it out of me, even more so I can not believe I am confessing it all to him. "They are so fucking sexy. How they look, how they feel..." I pause leaning more into his touch. "How you use them on stage." I bite my lip and lower my voice, "How you use them off stage. How you could use them on..." Somehow I have enough sanity left to stop myself. God how I want to say on me. I hope he can't gleam that. Who am I kidding, he is not that dense.

He leans closer now, his lips at my ear, "On you."

I shudder, hard almost instantly at the mere thought. His hand releases mine, and achingly slow, moves down my chest, headed straight for the bulge in my pants. It slides over the bulge and my breath hitches.

"Mmm this what you want Tommy?" He moves his hand along the front of my pants again and I squirm under the touch.

I am fighting the urge to crawl into his lap and let his hands devour my body. He moves his hand up under my shirt, the skin to skin contact slowly becoming overwhelming. He brings his other hand down and rids me of my shirt. His hands move up my chest, the edges of the rings graze my nipples. I moan in response, finally getting the courage to look at him, another of my big mistakes tonight. There is amusement there, lined with lust. He has always wanted me and I'm now giving him a fucking engraved invitation to touch me. I can't help myself, I ache for his hands on me.

"You like that kitty? Hmm? You want more?"

"Yes." My reply breathless as I feel his hands slid down to the front of my pants. He unbuttons them just enough to slip his hand inside.

His fingers slowly snake around my cock and I swear I nearly coming at the slightest touch. He just holds it still and it feels so fucking good. I am so far gone, of their own volition my hands are making quick work to unbutton my pants the rest of the way. I desperately want to rid myself of the offensive material, so I push them down to my knees. His hand moves and I freeze, unable to do anything but let the sensation wash over me. Another stroke and my head falls back with a long, tortured moan.

"That's right." Adam lets out a low, dark, laugh. "You want to come don't you Tommy?"

"Uh huh." I whimper as my body arches into his touch.

His grip tightens then, the rings adding to the delicious friction. His hand slips up over the tip as he slicks his hand with the liquid leaking there. He slides it back down my cock, making me groan. He moves to his knees in front of me, his lips mere inches from mine as he speaks.

"Then do it kitty." His hand moves fast, his grip so tight. He's roughly jerking my cock. "Come all over my fucking hand."

I come totally unglued when his free hand slides into my hair roughly yanking my head to the side. A litany of curses spewing from my lips as my orgasm takes me over. I come so hard, spilling over his hand. I look down to see the come sliding down his hand. So sexy. He must have seen me watching as he pulls his hand away, bringing the come covered fingers to my lips. I eagerly lap at them, and it is his turn to moan. I open my eyes, to look into his as I lick the come from them. His other hand slides down to his pants. It's blatantly obvious how aroused he is, sweatpants leave nothing at all to the imagination. I pull away from his fingers, and let my eyes wander to the hand unabashedly stroking himself through the pants. My eyes move back up to his as I grow bold.

"Stroke it for me Adam. I want to see your hands on it."

Adam smirks pulling away, "I bet you do." he slides his pants off, and tosses his shirt aside.

He slides back against the headboard, and curls a finger at me. Smug fucking bastard, with that damn accursed finger. Why do I always respond so eagerly to that? Again my body betrays as I crawl up next to him.

"You got off thinking about it haven't you?"

I really don't want to answer that. It will just make him even more smug. I'm quickly distracted from the question as his fingertips slid along his cock. It twitches at the light touch as he wraps his fingers slowly around it. His rings shine in the light as his hand begins to slowly move.

"Mmm stroke it." The words slip out, free of conscience thought, my gaze permanently locked on that damn hand.

"Only if you answer my question..." His hand stills, forcing me to look up with pleading eyes. They beg him to continue while asking him not to make me answer. He reaches out and grabs my chin, "Tell me."

"Yes." I reply through gritted teeth.

"I know..." That god damn smirk moves across his face again. I hate him sometimes, I really do.

He releases my chin, his hand moving back to his cock. My eyes following that hand where ever it goes. He starts to stroke it again, a low groan slips from his lips. I moan in response, my eyes leaving his hand to look up at him. His eyes are slowly fluttering shut, his mouth open, a look of pure pleasure.

"Stroke it Adam, make it come." I lick my lips at the thought of his come sliding deliciously over his hand.

Fuck, I'm getting hard again, but how can I fucking not. Those hands stroking that cock. His hand is moving faster now. I can tell by his ragged breaths he's getting close. I can't help myself as my hand wanders down to my own cock, stroking it slowly.

"Come all over that hand for me Adam. You know that's what I want to see."

"Fuck." He moans as his grip tightens.

I tear my eyes away to look up at his face again. His stare is locked on me, and it makes me shudder. Within seconds, my name crosses his lips as he starts to come. My eyes dart back down to his hand on his cock, moaning as I watch the come slid down his fingers and over the rings there. My own grip tightens the moment my cock twitches in my hand. Before I can comprehend what's happening, he's on me. He slides down my body, his lips hovering just inches from my hard cock. There is nothing but pure hunger in his eyes as he tears my hand away, and drags his tongue along my cock.

"Shit."

I can't even think straight right now with him dragging his lips against me. He brings his hand up sliding a finger over the tip. The hand is replaced by his mouth, and my head falls back. God his mouth, so warm, wet. His slick finger teases my hole and I tense. His other hand comes up and slides along my thigh, a reassuring touch. It's not enough for me. He deep throats my cock and all tension is gone. No one has done that to me before, and it's fucking incredible. Before I know it, he's slips that damn finger in my ass. My mind triggers my mouth to protest, but before I can, he hits a spot. Holy fucking shit. I can't even think. He sucks harder, pressing against it again and again. I'm a quivering mess on the brink of a huge orgasm, I can sense it. He takes all of me again, and stabs it hard one final time and I am shooting deep down his throat, a scream tore from my lips.

He pulls off me with another god damn smirk as he wipes his lips. I'm a panting mess, barely able to register anything anymore. I force myself to sit up and look at him. My eyes dart to his lips and his tongue darts out, sliding across the pouted bottom lip. Fucking great, now I'm gonna be obsessed with his lips. I hate you Adam Lambert, I really fucking do.


	2. Chapter 2

**Fascination **

Great, I'm barely over my hand obsession and now this. It's all his fucking fault. I swear I can still feel his lips around my cock. Why did he have to blow me? Why did those lips feel so good? So soft and full, that pouted bottom lip I barely want to let go when we kiss. You'd think this would have started long ago. He's been kissing me since the AMA's, but it never really affected me that much. OK I won't lie to myself, some of those kisses were damn good. His tongue is a weapon and those lips added ammo. Now I can't help but look back at the past, remembering those kisses, the times he'd whisper to me, those lips brushing my ear. I shudder now at the thought. This is going to be hell.

Now that he knows how I feel about his hands, I know he's going to mess with me. If he finds out about this... No, no I can't let that happen. I can't let what happened before happen again. I can't handle it. I hate him, I swear. I'm going to stop thinking about this, I swear. Where is my mp3 player? I need distraction.

Ah here we are. Hmm what to listen to? Fuck it, I'll just put it on shuffle. Just as the music starts I feel a tap on my shoulder. I don't want to look up because I know it's going to be him. I slowly look up, holding back the groan that's sitting near my lips. Sure enough, it's him. Does he have fucking ESP or something? I knew I should have just locked the damn door. I stop the music and pull the ear bud out of my ear.

"What Adam?" I swear I sound more annoyed than I really am.

"I'm hungry." He answers.

"So why are you telling me? It's called Room Service."

"I don't want Room Service. I want to go out."

"Well then go. You don't need me to hold your hand." Now I'm getting a bit annoyed.

"You'd like my hand on you." He smirked.

He stops me dead with that. I knew he was going to be like this. I groan, rolling my eyes, playing it off.

"Really? Wow you are lame." I start to put my ear bud back in, when he grabs my wrist.

"Please." He pouts his bottom lip and slides his fingers along my wrist.

Damn him. Damn his hands. Damn that delicious pouted lip. Hell who am I kidding, even before my new found obsession I couldn't resist that pout.

"OK." I sigh pulling the other ear bud out and turning off my player.

"Yay!" He smiles, "Let me go get ready." He walked off into his room.

"By the time you get ready, they'll be closed." I holler into the other room.

"Shut up and get ready yourself." He replies.

I look down at my jeans and T-shirt. This is pretty much ready for me. Not like we're going to a fancy restaurant or anything.

"Just come in here when you're ready." I reply, getting up to straighten my hair.

I run a comb through my hair, then find my hoodie and sunglasses. I sit on the bed again and fiddle with my sunglasses. I know him, it will be at least ten minutes. I can barely hear it, but he is humming to himself as he gets ready. There's something adorable about that. I set my sunglasses on my hoodie and get up walking into his room. Where do I find him? The bathroom of course. I stop and lean against the door frame. He hasn't seen me yet. I keep stealing glances. Watching his hands and fingers as they expertly apply eyeliner. He finishes and takes a once over, critiquing the job he has done. He slips a hand into his pocket. His brow furrows adorably as he searches for something.

"Ha." He proclaims, producing the lip gloss from his pocket.

I'm for it. I know I'm going to get caught staring now. He opens the gloss and slides his finger through it. He brings the finger to his lips and slowly applies the gloss. I can't help but bite my lip. Naturally he spots me then. A smirk slides across his lips as he sees my eyes follow the finger on his lips. Being the bastard that he is, he darts his tongue out, sliding it over the tip of his finger. I shift my weight as my cock twitches slightly. If he only knew the deadly assault the combination of his hand and those lips were unleashing on me.

"What is it kitty?" he says with that damn smug tone.

All I can do is fiddle with edge of my T-shirt. He walks over to me, and slides his slippery finger along my lips.

"I hate you." I mutter under my breath.

"No you don't." His finger slides away from my mouth., so his full hand is sliding along my neck. "Several things tell me you don't hate me. Those eyes for one." His hand slides around to the back of my neck and he tightens his grip. He dips his head, those damn lips touching my ear. "I see the lust in them Tommy, no matter how hard you try to fight it."

I shudder then, the lips, his hand, and the dark whisper in my ear, almost too much for me to bear. I wish I had the strength to push him away. I knew it was going to be like this.

"Adam... Please don't." I finally muster.

"What?" He drags his lips against my neck.

A curse sits as the edge of my lips. He's fucking torturing me. Those fucking lips. It's not even about his hand right now, even though it's moved to my chest, his fingers toying with my nipple through the shirt. I need to regain composure, and I try in vain.

"Aren't you hungry?" It comes out more breathless than intended.

He's back at my ear again, "Yes..." He groans this time and I feel him hardening against my thigh.

"Food." I almost moan the word, "For food." I try again before I get completely lost.

He nips at my neck and I can't fight the moan this time. Nipping and biting are a couple things that make me lose control. With a satisfied sound he bites harder, then drags his lips over the spot.

"Fuck."

I'm slipping, falling fast as those lips keep moving over my neck, kissing, nipping, biting. I give myself away too easily, but he clouds my senses. I glance over into the mirror and catch his eye. There's an evil glint there as he brings his hand up to my neck and into my hair. He yanks my head sideways, giving me a better view of him and my neck. I can't help but watch him as he stares with intent at my neck. He catches my eyes again, his are so dark with hunger as he tears away and goes back to my neck.

"You love my hands on you, don't you?"

"Yes... I..." I trail off as those lips scorch my neck once more.

"There's something else isn't there?"

How the fuck does he always know? No, I refuse. He will not trap me again. I swear I will not let it slip. His hand falls from my hair, working it's way down my back to my ass.

"Tell me kitty. You know I'll find out anyway."

Fucking bastard. Sad part is, he's telling the truth. One way or another he's going to get it out of me. I can't, not so soon after what just happened.

"Adam I..." I pause trying to catch my breath. "I can't. Please just stop."

Somehow I muster the courage and strength to push him away. He pulls back and looks at me. His eyes still full of lust as he falls back against the door. His hand slides down to the bulge in his all too tight pants. Unwillingly my eyes follow. His hand moves over it again and again. My name passes his lips in a long, deep moan.

"Should I stroke it for you Tommy? Mmm you love watching my hands."

God damn him. This is exactly why I can't tell him this. Fucking prick. Taking my last ounce of resistance, I walk out into the room. Away. Away from him. Away from those hands. Away from those lips. I can't go back, no matter how loud his moans are ringing in my ears. No matter how many times he says my name. I wish my imagination would stop with the fucking visuals.

"Fuck." His voice calls out in that all to well known tone.

My mind resists, but my body doesn't. He draws me back that quickly. I return to find him on the floor against the door. That fucking hand working his cock. His head is back against the door. Those delicious lips parted just right, making me wish my cock was between them. My cock throbbed at the mere thought. Praying I won't get caught, my hand slides down over my cock through my pants. I try to stifle the moan, but am unsuccessful. His eyes meet mine then, as he moves up to his knees. Those damn lips mere inches from my hand on my cock. I resist the urge to reach out and grab his hair to pull him closer. His hand still working his cock, he moans my name again. He's staring intently at my hand and what lies beneath it. I can't stop the shiver of excitement that flows through me. Fuck I want those lips on it, that mouth on it. Losing himself in his own pleasure, he places a hand on the floor. Nearly on all fours he looks up at me, slowly sliding his tongue across his lips. So fucking animalistic, at that moment I swear he was going to fuck me within an inch of my life.

"Fuck Adam." He looked so fucking ready. I swear I could come by that look and the lick of his lips.

"Tommy." My name tore from his lips in a near growl.

Panting and grunting he comes, spilling over his hand and onto the floor beneath him. All I can do is stand there stuck in time. I'm fucking rock hard, so close to the edge it isn't even funny. He slowly sits back on his feet and looks up at me. Even after that he's still semi erect, and looks at me with that fucking smirk.

"Are you going to tell me now kitty?" His voice is dripping sex, through the small pants he was making. His hands slide along my thighs. "Do I have to work it out of you?" He moves my hand from my cock, replacing it with his own. "You know I can." His free hand grabs my ass, pulling me closer. "Tell me Tommy." his hand moves on my crotch as he moves his head to rest against my thigh.

Dear fucking god I hate him. His mouth so perilously close to my cock. He's literally nuzzling my thigh. Fuck I want those lips on me. Why is that so damn sexy to me? Probably because he's acting like a little whore at my feet. It makes me want to grab his hair and make him choke on my fucking cock.

No, no, no! I need to stop, I can't let him do it. I feel like my brain is on repeat. I keep hearing the same thing over and over. At least my brain is still somewhat sane. My body is a different story. Every time his moves those lips closer to my cock my hips arch to urge him on.

"Tommy." His voice brings me out of my thoughts. "Tell me what you want kitty." He drags his mouth over my cock through my pants, "What you need."

I bit down so hard on my lip I swear it's bleeding. His hands moves to the edge of my pants, deftly unbuttoning them. He slips his hand inside, fingers grazing my cock. He drags his bottom lip against my cock as he looks up at me. I shudder on the edge of control, dangerously close to letting it spill from my lips.

"Kitty..." It pours from his lips in a breathless whisper, making my whole body tense. My hand moves then, fingers lacing in his dark locks.

"Those lips... those fucking lips." A shiver courses through me as I finally let it out.

The dark laugh comes then, as I knew it would. Fucking bastard. Growing bold, channeling my anger and frustration, my grip tightens on his hair. I twist it tight, forcing his head against me. It's his turn to shudder. I know he was not expecting that. I can't help myself. He's so fucking pretty like that. Playing right into my hands, he pulls my pants down. My cock aching so badly, I moan once it's free. I force him closer again, his lips brushing the tip of my cock. He slowly drags his lips over the tip again and again. Soft whimpers escape his lips as I look down at him. His eyes catch mine, his mouth open slightly, the tip of my cock resting against that delicious bottom lip. He has all the looks of an eager little come slut.

"Hot little bitch." It comes out in a groan.

I smirk then. Adam Lambert, the self proclaimed top, nothing more than a pretty bitch before me. I wonder what else I could get to see that no one else ever could.

"Suck it Adam, put those pretty lips to good use."

Without pause, he sucks the head into his mouth. It's fucking heaven, those lips, that mouth. Still I resist the urge to shove my cock down his throat. He pulls off and looks up at me.

"Like that kitty?" He whimpered, the drags his lips along the length of my cock.

"Yes... Mmm fuck."

I barely get the words out as he takes all of me in one swallow. I grab his hair just to steady myself from the sudden onslaught. He drags his tongue against me as he moves. He is too fucking good. I am so close already. I fear I will shoot any second. I look down at him again to see his hand slowly working his cock. It's my turn to smirk.

"Gonna come while sucking me off aren't you?"

He whimpers around my cock, his eyes answering for him. I twist the hair in my hand tighter.

"You like being a little come slut for me don't you? The self professed top loves being on his knees for me doesn't he?"

He shivers at my words, his hand working faster.

"Make me come Adam."

He pulls off to reply, "Yes..." So breathless, so needy, so hot.

He takes all of me in one slow swallow and I'm lost in pure sensation. He works my cock expertly, licking and sucking.

"Fuck Adam, I'm gonna shoot." I pull him off of me, my free hand grasps my cock. "I want to shoot all over those pretty bitch lips."

A few hard, fast stroke and I'm coming all over those god damn lips. He moans then, my name I think, I'm too lost to tell. My eyes are glued to my come dripping from his lips. The trance broken, by his eyes slipping closed, the ragged breaths.

"That's it bitch, come for me. Show me how much you love being my dirty slut."

"Fuck." is all he can muster as he comes with a shudder.

"Yes, that's it Adam. So fucking pretty when you come."

I reach out and drag my finger through my come on his lips. He's barely recovered, but his tongue darts out, curling around my come covered fingertip. I can't stop the soft moan that escapes my lips. Our eyes meet then, both of us clearly trying to comprehend what has just transpired. I pull away then, suddenly all to aware of what just happened.

I've done it again. I let him get the best of me, but there is something else going on here. I'm not sure either of us are willing to admit it. He wouldn't let just anyone do what I just did to him.

I can't. I can't look at him anymore. Not right now.

Without a word I grab my pants and pull them up. I turn to leave and his hand grabs mine to stop me. I let out a heavy sigh as I hear him get to his feet, straightening himself up. I refuse to turn to look at him. He grabs my shoulders and turns me to face him.

Before I can voice a protest, he kisses me. It's nothing like the others, not playful or lust filled. There's so much emotion in it, my body shivers with the intensity of it. He pulls away leaving us both breathless. I can see the turmoil in his eyes, it's as strong as what I feel. He speaks first.

"Stay with me."

All I can do is not my head. I think the both of us have a lot to talk about.


	3. Chapter 3

**Realization**

He pulls away first looking over himself.

"I should clean up."

"Me too. Um, let me go change."

"OK." He replies as he heads to the bathroom.

I can't help but smile watching him. There are so many sides to him, and I think I'm the only one who has seen them all. I'm really growing to enjoy each of them. I need to clean up and change. I head to the bathroom quickly cleaning up. I grab a new t-shirt and some boxers slipping them on. I walk back into his room and he's slipping on a t-shirt.

"Are you still hungry?" I ask sitting on the bed near the phone.

"Yeah." he replies turning to face me.

"What do you want?" I ask looking for the room service menu.

"Um, maybe just a cheeseburger and fries." He replies walking around to the other side of the bed and sitting down.

"OK." I reply dialing the room service number. I order quickly and hang up.

I turn to face him and see he's been watching me the whole time. I bite my lip. It's weird how I was just completely comfortable with him and now I'm nervous again. I need to relax, it's just Adam. Although I can tell I'm not the only nervous one. He's fidgeting with the rings on his fingers. One of us has to speak. We really need to talk about this. About us. Is there an us? I muster up the courage first.

"Adam, I um... We really need to talk about what's happening here."

"I know. What I need to know is why now? All those times I tried. Every time you said no, telling me how straight you are, or how we're just friends."

"Adam, do you realized how hard this is for me? I've been struggling with this for months now. My life has taken a total turn around in so many ways. Once I wrapped my head around the fame I was getting being your bassist, then the rest started to creep up on me."

A knock on the door interrupts my confession.

"Hold that thought." He says, getting up to get our food.

I sit there looking down at my hands. I wish I could say I was still hungry. I hear him thank the guy and shut the door. He comes over and sets the tray down between us, before sitting back down. I grab my soda, taking a small drink before setting it aside. Maybe I should have gotten alcohol. I sit there for a second just watching him. He is meticulously picking apart his burger arranging it just how he likes before globing ketchup on it. For some reason my heart does a funny little flip. I just love watching him be his normal self. He looks up and smiles offering me the ketchup. I take it and pour some on my plate before setting it back on the tray. I grab a fry and drag it through the ketchup and take a bite. After several bites of burger he grabs a napkin wiping his face. I can't help but laugh at the glob of ketchup on his chin.

"What?"

"You got ketchup on your chin." I reach over and swipe it clean. That quickly he grabs my hand, closing his mouth around the ketchup covered finger, sucking it off.

Damn it! Why did he bring the sexy back? For a split second I'm totally lost in his eyes. He releases my finger and hand going back to his meal. How the fuck does he do that? I clear my throat, trying to get back to the subject at hand.

"Aren't you going to eat?" He asks.

"Maybe later." I take my plate setting it on the nightstand. "Adam I really need to get this out."

He stops then, with the last bite of burger in his hand.

"I'm sorry. I was so hungry and it smelled so good."

I can't help but smile, " I know, finish it off. I can wait another minute."

He happily eats the last bite and wipes his face. He moves the tray to the floor then looks back at me giving me his full attention.

"Where was I?" I honestly can't remember.

"You were telling me about struggling with getting famous, and about how other things were creeping up on you."

"Oh yeah." I love that about him. He really does listen when I talk. "It's just so difficult for me. Our friendship came first, and I really treasure that. You are one of the best friends I've ever had. I really don't want to lose that, ever. When I started having these sexual thoughts about you... Well at first I was like, whoa, wait a minute. I've never thought of guys like that. I wasn't repulsed by it or anything, it just wasn't me."

He grabs my hand then, as if sensing how hard this was for me. I look up to see him smiling at me. My heart melts at that smile. I let out a sigh and continue.

"What makes it worse is that, you know technically, you're my boss. Yet another line I didn't want to cross. I really don't want to fuck up what we have. Another thing is, I didn't want to be just another notch in your belt. I mean face it Adam, you're a whore for anything pretty with a dick. I didn't want to be one more pretty boy on your list of conquests."

He puts his other hand over mine, then speaks.

"Tommy I... Wow I don't even know where to begin." His grip tightens then, letting me feel his own torment. I look into his eyes, seeing it there as well.

"The beginning Adam."

He smiles a little.

"Yeah, I guess. Well at first I wanted you so badly. You are just so beautiful Tommy, I can't help myself. I know those first couple months were pretty bad. I must apologies for that. My wants get the best of me sometimes. I really value our friendship too. I love spending time with you, you never cease to amuse me. It's because of that friendship I stopped my pursuit. Believe me, I'd never add you as a notch on my belt. You mean a hell of a lot more to me than those fans boys. I tried desperately to keep you out of my fantasies. I thought to myself that kissing you on stage would be enough for me. And it was for the longest time, but then you came to me. You drug me back down into my fantasies. Once I got my hands on you for the first time it all flooded me. Tonight threw me over the edge. I was so lost in need, lust, I was barely in control of myself."

"You were like an animal that first time tonight. I thought for sure you were going to rape me or something. I was scared, but at the same time utterly lost in the sight of you like that. Just thinking about it makes me shudder." My confession makes him blush slightly.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me."

"No don't apologize. I'll admit that was one of the hottest things I've ever seen."

A slight smirk surfaces, "I bet."

I let out a small sound of irritation, "How do you do that?"

"What?" He arches an eyebrow.

"Go from adorable to sexy in like two seconds."

"Oh that." There's that god damn smug tone. "I'm just so highly sexual, it just pops in and out."

"Yeah... Can we get back on subject?"

"Sorry. Where was I? Oh yeah, tonight. It all just attacked me at once. I was willing to do anything to keep you here with me. Even if anything was being on my knees in front of you. I wanted you so badly, I let go of everything. Although I didn't think you would go that far with it. Never expected, bitch, slut, and whore to cross your lips."

It was my turn to blush slightly, "Sorry I... fuck I'm not going to sugar coat it. You are so fucking hot on your knees in front of me. Such a pretty bitch, but I have an idea that you know that."

"Perhaps." He replies sliding the tip of his tongue against his bottom lip.

"Stop that shit."

"Hehe sorry." He laughs.

"Adam."

"Yeah." The laughter stops as he looks into my eyes.

"There's one think I really need to know."

"What is it Tommy?"

"That last kiss, it rattled me to the core. What is really going on with you Adam? With us?"

He let out a long, heavy sigh, gathering his thoughts before he speaks. He lets go of my hand and moves off the bed. He's really fighting with himself, I can tell.

"See this is where I start to feel like you." He begins, "I love our friendship, I really, really don't want to fuck it up. I also don't want to lose you as part of my band. If things go south I could lose it all. I can't let that happen."

I get up then, and walk over to him. I reach up sliding my hand along his cheek.

"Just say it Adam."

He pulls me closer then. I know it's teetering on his lips. He dips his head and takes my lips in a long slow kiss, before pulling away resting his forehead against mine.

"I love you Tommy." He kisses me softly again, "I love you so fucking much."

I sigh, feeling the weight lifted from my shoulders.

"I love you too. I think I have for a long time."

I move in closer. I can't get enough of the feel of him, his scent. I inhale deeply taking that scent in. A hint of cologne and his unique scent. All so intoxicating. Might as well chalk up his scent as my next obsession. At least I don't have to try and hide if from him this time.

"You smell so fucking good." I murmur against his chest. "What cologne is that?"

"Dior." He replies.

"It smells fucking incredible, especially mixed with your unique scent."

My hand slides into his hair as I inhale the scent at his neck, moaning softly. I gently move against him.

"Mmm I knew there was a reason I call you kitty." The smug tone is back, but I'll admit, I love that too. He dips his head, lips at my ear, "You turn into a cat in heat when you find something you like."

I shiver and reply, "Well who am I going to get? Rockstar sex god, or pretty, sexy, bitch?"

He moans into my ear, "Which do you want kitty?" His hand slides along my back.

"Why don't we just see what happens." I reply edging us back towards the bed.

He laughs softly as he falls back onto the bed. I slowly crawl up on top of him. I'm back at his neck, indulging in the strong scent there. My hand slides along his chest through his shirt. I softly kiss his neck as I feel his body totally melt under me. He moans softly as a hand tangles in my hair.

"Tommy."

As my name crosses his lips, I bite gently making him groan. It's then I feel him starting to get hard against me. My body responds, grinding against him. My hand slides under his shirt, my hand aching to feel his skin. I flatten my hand, running my palm over his nipple making him whimper. I wonder how much longer I can torture him. I slide down a bit and push his shirt up. My mouth latches onto the nearest nipple as my fingers tease the other. I'm really enjoying exploring and experimenting. He grabs me then, pulling me up and taking my lips. The kiss is ravenous as he rolls us over, pinning me beneath him. He straddles me, pulling his shirt off and tossing it aside. He grips my shirt working it up and off. I reach up, sliding my hand around his neck, pulling him down to me. He smiles before taking my lips in another kiss. It's then he starts to grind his ass against me.

"Fuck Tommy, so hard."

"Yes." It comes out in a hiss as he works himself against me. "So fucking hot like that Adam."

"Am I?" He smirks, grinding harder. "This what you want Tommy? Huh? Want a pretty bitch on your cock..." He shifts then, hovering over me. He grinds his rock hard cock against mine through our pants. I can't help but groan at the feel. "Or do you want this rockstar cock?"

I'm so fucking hard right now I can't think straight. How the hell am I supposed to decide?

"I want..." I pant.

"What kitty?" He grinds against me again.

"I want to feel it against mine."

"Mmm do you?" He smirks as he slides off the bed to rid himself of his pants.

All I can do is lay there and stare. He stands there naked, painfully aroused. He is so fucking big, thick. He slides his hand along his cock and my eyes are transfixed.

"Fuck." The groan escapes my lips as I watch.

I can barely function as I fumble with my boxers. I can't get them off fast enough. He looks so damn delicious as he lazily strokes himself. Before I realize it, I'm off the bed my body pressed against his. The need to feel his skin overwhelming me. He takes the opportunity to turn us, pressing me against the wall. His hands on either side of my head as he grinds his cock against mine.

"This what you want kitty? This rockstar cock against yours."

"Yes. Feels so good Adam."

"Call me rockstar." His tone dark, demanding. I shudder at his demand.

"Yes rockstar." His eyes darken as the name passes my lips.

"Good kitty." He pulls away, sliding a hand along my chest down to my cock. He gives it a few rough strokes. My hips arch to meet his hand.

"On the bed." Another demand and I am more than willing to comply.

His hand falls away and I whimper at the loss of sensation. I move over to the bed, sitting in the middle of it. I bite my lip, nerves sneak through the need and lust. He moves over to the nightstand opening the drawer. Grabbing a tube of lube I presume. I'm not that naive to the ways of gay sex. He sets it next to me and climbs onto the bed. He straddles my legs, both hands grabbing my head, pulling me in for a kiss. God those lips, I could kiss them forever. My hand slips between is as I find his cock. I slowly wrap my fingers around it. He moans into my mouth and it urges me on. I slowly stroke him, feeling it throb in my hand. He breaks the kiss panting.

"Fuck yeah, stroke it."

"So hard rockstar. Throbbing."

"I know. You always make it throb kitty."

"Do I?" I arch an eyebrow, smirking slightly.

"Yes." His eyes lock with mine and I see the fierce need in them.

"What do you need rockstar?" I emphasize the question with a slow, but rough stroke.

"You." He wretches my hand away and pushes me back against the bed.

I gasp softly and stare up at him. He grabs the lube and pops the top. The nerves rush back as I watch him pour some onto his fingers. He sets the tube aside and looks down at me. A smile breaks through the cocky, rockstar, facade.

"Don't worry, I could never hurt you."

The tension melts along with my heart. I'll never be able to figure out how he switches so easily. I'm brought out of my thoughts by a slick finger slowly sliding into me. He moves it in and out a bit until I relax around it. I look down to watch him. He's mesmerized by his finger moving into me. He gently adds a second finger and looks up. He catches my eyes just as his fingers nudge that spot. The sensation making me all too aware of my need. I slide a hand down to my cock stroking it. He laughs softly.

"Feels good don't it?"

"Yes... more." I whimper.

With that he adds a third finger stretching me even more. It hurts a little, but feels good. With every movement of his fingers he nudges my spot. He has to know it's driving me crazy.

"Please rockstar..."

"Please what?" That infernal smirk is back.

"I... I want..." He has me panting so hard I can barely say it. "I want your cock."

He moans then, although it sounds more like a growl to me. He slips his fingers out and grabs the lube again. He squirts some into his palm and tosses it aside. He slowly moves his hand along his cock, covering it completely with the lube. He moves over me, staring down into my eyes. His cock is poised at my ass. He gently teases me before inching the head in.

"Oh fuck." He's barely in and already feels too big.

"Relax kitty." He whispers before taking my lips.

I whimper into his mouth as he moves deeper and deeper into me. He breaks the kiss panting.

"So fucking tight. Shit." He buries his head in my shoulder as he's finally easing all the way in.

"So big rockstar. Hurts a bit."

He raises his head, sliding a hand against my cheek.

"Calm down baby, it will feel really good in a minute."

I nod in reply, willing my body to relax. Even in the midst of all this, I see the love in his eyes. It's as raw as the lust it resides with. I feel his body shivering. He has to calm down himself or it will be over all too soon. We both are stuck in time, staring at each other. I know he's wanted this so much longer than I have, but I feel it just as strong. One of us has to break the spell. I push against him softly and he moans.

"Fuck me rockstar." I whimper, my need overcoming me.

The darkness clouds his eyes at my words. He grinds hard against my spot, making moans pour from my lips. His thrusts are slow at first, testing my reaction. I move against him, my body wants more. I want more. He thrusts harder, faster. Each more urgent than the last. He buries his head in my shoulder and I take the opportunity to inhale his scent. The sweat making his musky scent even more powerful. My senses fill with him. The scent of our sex, his body. His ragged moans and curses in my ear. The feel of his body as I run my hands over his back. I slip my hand between us. My cock is aching for attention. As if feeling my hand move between us, his hand joins mine.

"Come for me kitty. Make this rockstar cock shoot in your ass." He growls it into my ear and it makes me throb even more.

"Yes rockstar. Oh fuck!"

Conscience thought lost, my hand falls away as he takes the lead. A few hard, fast strokes and I'm coming with a scream beneath him.

"Yes, that's it kitty." He groans, his hand coming up to brace himself as he thrusts harder, faster.

"Get it rockstar." I moan working my ass against him.

"Fuck Tommy, Fuck!"

With one last thrust I feel him spill into my ass. I whimper at the sensation, still moving against him.

"Yes rockstar." Panting, I slide my hands along his back.

He slowly slips out of me, collapsing on the bed beside me. "Fuck." Is all he can say.

I curl up at his side, nuzzling his chest, as my hand slides down his stomach.

"Adam that..." I try to find the words, "That was incredible." I sigh like a content kitten as he slides his arm around me. I look up and see a warm smile on his face.

"It was. I didn't hurt you did I?"

"No, no. Not at all."

"Good." He leans down and kisses my forehead.

Wanting more, I move up against him. I look into his eyes, seeing all the love right there at the surface. So much emotion wells up. All I can do is kiss him. I pour everything in my kiss. He pulls away first, his lips mere inches from mine.

"I love you Tommy Joe."

I can't stop the smile spreading across my face.

"I love you too Adam."


End file.
